"Balance is the key, in selling as in life," says sales expert Gerhard Gschwandtner, publisher and managing editor of Personal Selling Power.

For example, you have to balance the ability to be friendly with the ability to be firm. You may make a friend if you're too friendly, but you won't walk away with the order.

You may get the order if you're too firm, but then find it's canceled the next day.

You also have to maintain a balance of friendliness and firmness in dealing with yourself. You do such things as procrastinate, overeat or use drugs when you're too friendly with yourself.

"You don't discipline yourself because you want to indulge and gratify yourself," says Gschwandtner. "But when you're too hard on yourself, you hurt your productivity and aren't happy either. Balance is necessary."

You can be firm and assertive when you're selling something, either an idea or a product, if you keep in mind that the customer has a need and you know he will benefit from the purchase.

"But you may find that some people back out later, even though you think you've sold them on an idea, a product or a project when you're talking to them. If they do, examine two aspects of your presentation: logic and emotion, and see if the two are balanced," suggests Gschwandtner, author of $uper$eller$. *

Logic builds knowledge, security or reassurance in the customer.